Friday, May 28, 2010

My dogs were barkin' loud and clear

by the time I stood still for two minutes tonight. Today was one of those days where, while waddling into work and admiring all of the happy people enjoying the sunshine and pure freedom from responsibility, made me think, "Wow....I have a whole 9.5 hours left before I can go home. And when I do go home, it'll be too dark to have fun and the only thing I have to look forward to is wounds from my heel-biting Labrador." The hours draggggggged by today. Geeeeeeez. I used the odd amount of free time for a Friday to stay somewhat productive at work. I finished some paperwork, cleaned the stock room, had an aneurysm while trying to create the concoction that should technically be deemed the "June Store Schedule" and came to the disheartening realization that my feet had mysteriously grown a size because Betsey Johnson shoes in a size 8 no longer fit me. To make shoe-matters ultimately worse, I came to the realization that my freaky genetically-inherited "peace sign" looking toes look somewhat longer these days and hang oddly off the tops of my now ill-fitting flip flops. (I'm sorry Quinn if I happen to pass these freaks of nature onto your innocent bone structure!) At 5:30, I sent my sweet companion M home for the day and felt a bit more confident that I'd be able to handle an extremely slow Friday night by my lonesome. I had some big plans to do some much-needed Swiffering. Maybe even a bit of Windexing. Around 6:30 however, my plans were foiled as I was bombarded by an insane amount of customers drooling at the mouths over our latest sale where everything is free!!!! (Well, almost free, thanks to heafty Memorial Day discounts.) At some point, all four fitting rooms were filled with bargain obsessed women and to top it off, three of my best customers all happened to show up at the same time to hang out and gossip during the pandemonium that was developing around us! I became Medusa! But instead of a million snakes coming out of my hair, I had a million arms jetting out of my body....some of them were grabbing more sizes from the back. Others were buckling shoes, closing curtains, re-hanging clothing and grabbing jewelry from the front counter. At some point I thought I had popped the baby out but then realized that someone had just knocked a fruity looking tea beverage onto the floor. It was insane!!! I can only imagine what passerbyers were thinking as they walked past the store...watching a giant manatee running around the store with her arms flailing about like one of those crazy stop-motion Charlie Chaplin movies from the 20's. Two hours blew by like two minutes and by the time my friend Jessica popped in to say hello just before 9:00, I thought I could possibly throw up. I guzzled down 40 gallons of water, confirming my assumption that I am turning into some kind of giant water mammal.

I did all of the closing duties in record time and peaced out of there like I was on some kind of mission...eventually hoisting my achy body onto a ledge to wait for my night in shining armor to pick me up and drive me home.

Here I am, with feet aching from running a marathon around 600 square feet and Labrador teeth nips but it feels sooooooooo good to know that sleep awaits very shortly. WHAT A DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Only three more weeks, Tara!!!! Three. More. Weeks.

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